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“It is not good for the man to be alone,” said God of His first human creation. From the beginning, we were designed to need each other, to depend on each other, to find joy in serving each other–and to draw comfort and strength from each other.
The majority of people who commit suicide are both depressed and lonely. It’s not necessarily a loneliness that comes from being “alone”; many such people are highly popular and in demand by objective standards. The sort of loneliness that lines the pit of despair is a deep, dark feeling that no one really understands or cares, that your friends only like you because they have no idea how flawed you really are, that there’s not a person on earth you can trust with your hardest struggles and weaknesses. Remember, one of the Fall’s sad consequences was that Adam and Eve became ashamed of their literal and metaphorical nakedness.
Often, depressed people believe that God Himself has abandoned them, or perhaps was never there at all. While, theoretically, God should be company enough for anyone (certainly He is the only One capable of meeting all our needs), it’s often easier to accept comfort from someone on our own level. Especially when we’re so down that we can’t find the strength to look beyond that level.
And if you think the great saints got along fine without human support, read your Bible again and consider:
- Elijah craving reassurance that he was not the last person in the world trying to do what was right;
- Paul feeling almost completely alone and longing to see his old friends one last time in this life;
- Jesus urging His friends to pray for Him during His struggle in Gethsemane.
Of course, you may be all too aware of your own need for human support–and doubly depressed because you’ve all but given up hope of finding any. If you’re in that situation, try:
- Continuing to pray that human support will materialize, whether or not you see an instant “Yes”–and reviewing the Scriptures for reassurance of God’s care. (It may help to take a day off and get alone with God in a quiet place.)
- Thinking twice before you conclude that your present family and friends would never understand. If they have a history of supporting you and of treating others with empathy and respect, it’s very unlikely they’ll disown you at the first admission of weakness. (They may already know anyway.)
- Speaking with a Christian counselor (you don’t have to be an official member of most churches to take advantage of pastoral-support services).
- Sharing your struggles with a church or online prayer group–or with an addiction or mental-illness peer support group.
If you like, feel free to post your support requests in the comments for this post, with or without your real name. As a sister in Christ, I’ll promise my personal prayer support!
Strength for the Weary 